ONE YEAR SOBER!!!

(A leap year too!!)

What a journey! - Let's talk about it...😁

You guys... I have done it. 366 freakin' days!!!😱

Firstly, I want to start off by telling you all some of the things that this journey has taught me over the last 12 months. I have taken some time to sit and reflect on everything that I have felt, seen, read and learnt since making the decision to be alcohol free and I have come up with seven things that I want to share with you. (In no particular order!):

1. It is okay to feel. - The main reason I drank so much was because I didn't want to actually feel any of the things that I was feeling. I wanted to numb everything and to push it all as far to the back of my brain as possible. However, since being sober, I have learnt that it is not only okay to feel but it is necessary in order to heal from the things that hurt. It sucks so much at first but with a bit of help from therapy, learning to cope in healthy ways, is possible!

2. You can have fun without alcohol. - I am British, so when I talk about this part, I am mainly talking about the British culture and society. Drinking is a massive part of most British things. Any celebration revolves around drinking. The clock strikes 12pm, it's the afternoon, so lets have a pint. It's the weekend... lets go to the pub. I want to see my friend, we will meet up for bottomless brunch. I have guests coming over, I'll open the wine. Etc... I know there are many other places that are similar too. However, I have learnt, over the past year, that there are so many things that you can do that don't HAVE to involve drinking. Going for food, bowling, local attractions, coffee, etc... and they are often even more fun without drink. If you want to find sober activities, you can and if your support network truly support you, alcohol not being involved won't bother them.

3. Nobody else really cares if you drink, despite stupid comments sometimes. - When you first get sober, there may be people that may make silly comments or "jokes" about it. However, as time goes on, you start to realise how much people really don't care if others do or don't drink and the anxiety of worrying about what people may or may not think of you because you are sober, fades away.

4. No drinking and no hangovers, means more time for other things. - Have you ever sat and actually thought about how much time you have spent drinking, drunk or hungover? Imagine what you could be doing instead. A nice Sunday morning walk with a friend/loved one instead of spending all morning lay still so you don't vom, will always make me feel so grateful for having done this. It is almost like a gift to yourself. The amount of hobbies you can try out is actually so exciting.

5. Zero hanxiety. - This one explains itself really.

6. Your confidence will only grow. - The more you put yourself out there without needing to drink first, the more confidence you will gain. The more you are in control and the less you are under the influence, the more you will shine. The best quote to repeat to yourself for this is... "Feel the fear and DO IT ANYWAY... without alcohol!" You've got this.

7. Therapy ACTUALLY solves the problems that alcohol can only numb temporarily.

(I have got my sparkle back!!!)

A year ago, I had no idea if I would even make it one week. I said to myself that I was going to aim for a sober Christmas and that if I could do that, that would be enough for me. Christmas came and it went and I was still sober. I then said "fuck it, I am going for this" and the rest is history. I told everyone in my support system and I was so lucky because they were all supportive. If I am being honest, my parents had been trying to get me to stop drinking for a long time, so they were probably relieved and my boyfriend had discussed sobriety with me a good few times, so I KNOW he was. Looking back on the start of this journey makes me super emotional now because I had tried a few times and failed a few times before but this time, I have given it EVERYTHING and it has paid off. 12 months later, I am still sober, I am happier, I have new hobbies, I have gone back to education, I have faced fears (like joining the gym), I have lost weight (see the before VS after to the right), I have dealt with issues, I have made friends and I have made myself SO proud.

                     (My boy!!)

I want to give the BIGGEST shoutout to my boyfriend, who you guys will know as Mario!! Not only has he supported me, held me in the harder times and encouraged me whenever I have needed it... he went sober with me! So first of all, happy one year of sobriety to you babycakes, I am SO proud of you and secondly, THANK YOU, THANK YOU, THANK YOU! You are my best friend and biggest supporter. I love you forever and appreciate you always.💖💖💖

Social media has been a massive help to me during my sobriety. Especially Instagram and threads. So, I went onto threads last week and asked what my friends over there wanted to know about my journey to do a little q&a type thing. (See my profiles to the right.) I have made so many friends on these platforms and I have been given so much helpful advise. I know that social media can be toxic sometimes and don't get me wrong, I have had people be horrible BUT the amount of love and support I have been given by the sober community, has held me accountable during so many wobbly moments. I truly have never felt so accepted and at home online before and I am so grateful for everyone that I have met since the start. If any of you are here reading this, I love you, I believe in you and I am so happy that I know you. Thank you SO much!💕

Here are the questions and things people wanted to know & my answers:

retiredpartygirlkay - "Reflecting on one year, share with us what coping skills you found worked best for you!"

Me - Honestly, for me, the coping skills that have worked best are speaking about how I feel, using hobbies as healthy distractions and dealing with my issues head on! It has been really hard to not just reach for the bottle when things have been hard but it has been SO rewarding to use other methods instead!

ma_dukes_67 - "How are you feeling about day 366?"

Me - Proud, happy, and excited for the next chapter!

collinrobinson_ - "What are some of the moments you wrote off as "normal". When in reality they were deeply rooted in addiction, or at least very problematic."

Me - I 100% know now that the way I thought drinking so much at home was normal for people my age, was DEEPLY rooted in addiction. I thought that because I am young, it is more than normal to consume dangerous amounts of alcohol each day/week and that there wasn't a problem with it because everyone else is doing it. That is NOT true.

colinasturgess - "How the fk have you found the strength to do so?"

Me - I honestly give so much of the credit to my boyfriend. He is my reason and my life. I always say, as well, that in order to be sober, you have to WANT to be sober.

captainamandica - "Your hardest experience and how you got through it."

Me - I have been suffering with PTSD for a few years and I honestly think that the days where I am really triggered are the hardest part of this for me because I want to numb the pain so bad. However, I get through it by holding myself accountable, celebrating sober milestones, talking about my feelings and going to therapy. You HAVE TO want it!!

stephiej73 - "I guess highs and lows and any milestones within that year."

Me - There have been so many highs and lows and I think that everyone will have such different ones too! I like to remind myself that without lows, there wouldn't be highs. You have to ride the waves and remember that they will settle. I use the "I Am Sober" app and I have celebrated every single milestone that they have listed in one way or another. That has been one of the things thats helped to keep me sober. I highly recommend the app!!

the_other_pete - "What were you like, what happened and what are you like now?"

Me - Before sobriety, I was lost, depressed and felt no hope. I decided after a bad binge that I wanted to be happy and that I deserved to be. Only I could do that for myself. Now that I am sober, I am stronger, kinder, more patient, lighter and just all round a better person!

bevanpatrick - "I'd be interested in your take on zero alcohol beers. I found I almost developed a new addiction in the summer and had to stop buying them."

Me - I personally love NA alternatives and have found that they have helped me so much on my personal journey. However, I do also know that they can be very triggering to other sober people and some people actually hate them. I think that they are subjective and it is up to the individual to decide if they are something they are able to enjoy without going back to alcohol. There is no shame in not being able to or not wanting to drink them at all and there is no shame in enjoying them either. Each to their own! I am so happy that you were able to accept that they were an issue for you and you were strong enough to walk away from them, that is amazing!!!

Thank you so much to everyone that sent a question/let me know what they wanted to know. I appreciate you all so much!💕

(One of my fav NA wines!!)

I'd like to take a second with you, reader, to raise a glass of some NA wine, a pint of NA beer, a can of your favorite pop or a hot beverage of some kind in honor of the past year and the support I have received from you. I am so proud of myself and if you yourself are on your sobriety journey and you are DOING IT, I am SO proud of you too!!! Life is hard sometimes and so much happens but through it all, the best gift you can give to yourself is love and respect and I truly believe that sobriety is one of the best ways to do that.💖

Celebrate every day that you are sober, every milestone and remember ONE DAY AT A TIME.💝

That is all from me today!! Thank you for being here and for reading about the last year of my life. If you want to contact me or to follow my journey some more, you can find me on threads and insta as @imsoberpositive !! I would love to connect with you, to know what you think of these blogs and what you would like to see next.

Until next time,

Keep going & remember, one day at a time.

-P x

*All images are taken/made by me unless stated otherwise. If you use them, please credit/tag me @imsoberpositive*